Keith: It is difficult as a man, because the disease is predominantly in women. I try to get as much information as I can from magazines and the Lupus Foundation of America to explain that this disease affects men—me included.

Harvey: I tell people that my grandfather had lupus and died from disease complications, and one of every 10 people diagnosed with lupus is male. I still get some pretty strange looks, because most people still don’t really know what lupus is.

Steven: Yes, more women have lupus than men. But it can strike anyone at any time. I am an example of that, and just knowing I am not alone keeps me going.

David: Having family, friends, and faith. Also, having an attorney to help me navigate the Social Security process has been a tremendous help in taking a burden off my shoulders.

Charles: My wife has been the most supportive person to me. My church family has been invaluable: They shovel snow, cook meals, watch my children, support my wife, visit me in the hospital, and pray for me, as well as anything else I might ask for. When I first found out I had lupus, my wife—girlfriend at the time—took me to a support group every month, and it was so helpful. I met other men with lupus, and I was able to help them a little after I became more comfortable there.

Steven: My biggest supporters are my wife and family. My local chapter of the Lupus Foundation of America has also been there for great support and information on this new life I lead.

Steven: Listen to your body: When it needs to rest, do so, and the pain will be less severe. When you are able, exercise lightly to keep your strength up.

Charles: I have gotten a hot tub, and this has proved to alleviate a great deal of pain. I have a bed that adjusts firmness, which I think is invaluable to lupus patients. Sleeping is one of the most important things to get in quality quantities.

Keith: I was always into sports, always fit and healthy. I also played professional soccer and was dedicated to being in shape. When I got out of the hospital I tried to stay active, working out in the gym, playing soccer, and lifting weights along with cardiovascular activities. I feel like the medications have helped with my journey with lupus. The disease is tough; I still use the gym, but do not play sports like I used to. My biggest dislike for having the disease is not being able to enjoy the sun, but I try to go out every day with my sunblock on and my umbrella for shade.

Steven: I like to consider sports a hobby; mine are working on cars and building things. I just take the full-sized version and scale it down to building models. It keeps my mind busy, and I feel as though I am creating something. Just scale it to what you can do.

David: Letting my children or family and friends read about lupus makes it easier, because then they can see the symptoms and relate to what I am going through.

Charles: Since I do not work, I can use the energy that I do have to spend time with my children. I won’t be able to play football with them, but there are many things I can do with them. We take walks; I try to ride bikes with them or push them on a shady swing set. When I am not feeling well or am low on energy, we watch movies or read books together.

David: I’ve learned to let go and enjoy the good times and understand that the flares are temporary. The quality time I spend with family is more important to me now. Understanding that I am not alone makes it easier to cope.

Keith: I have grown mentally, developed patience, and become heavily dependent on family support. I honestly try to have a positive look at life, which helps me to get by on a daily basis. Seeing my doctors and hearing good news is always a plus.

Harvey: I have learned I can handle far greater pain than I had ever thought possible before being diagnosed. It is much easier to take one day at a time than I had ever thought it would be.

Steven: That I can adapt and overcome by not giving up and by taking one day at a time. Most important, I listen to my body and don’t try to be Superman!

Charles: I have learned I can laugh at anything. I have learned I am stronger than I thought. I have learned that I can take a lot more pain than I ever knew. I have learned that frustration is now a part of my life. I have learned to enjoy every minute and not to sweat the small stuff.